Bad Money-Saving 'Coupons'

You know, what would happen if you recieved really stupid coupons with your newspaper or at your doorstep, instead of the usual Domino's or Pizza Hut ones? You'd freak out! Here are some examples of those type of coupons: -

Save $1.50 when you buy Monthlies expandable diapers! Hurry! Offer expires today!
Announcing the arrival of MONTHLIES! The new expandable diapers!
With new Monthlies, constant changing's a thing of the past! A patented reservoir fanny e-x-p-a-n-d-s to carry a month's worth of load - as much as your little one can dish out! A super absorbent, quicklime lining locks in most odours while decomposing waste. Dated "change me" stickers reind you when it's time to change the diaper.
Warning:May cause severe rashes in some infants. Also no money back for diarrhoeatic infants.

Save $1.00 when you buy any size bag of 3rd degree Spontaneous Combustion Charcoal Squares and 3rd degree Oily Rags. In a forgotten corner of your local supermarket. Expires sometime this year.
Tired of waiting.... and waiting.... and waiting.... for the grill to heat up? Food's ready faster when the charcoal starts itself! Buy 3rd degree Spontaneous Combustion Charcoal Squares!
Warning:Never store loose charcoal squares in baby's crib without adequate ventilation.

Save $0.50 on buying 3 cans of Fixed Income Fixins Cat & Lunatic Food - Tuna & Cheese Taco. Hurry! Expired just a few minutes ago!
"A delicious meal we can enjoy together!" says Idiot refering to her cat and herself. She is a resident of the Missippi Mental Institution and she and her cat enjoy it so much that they eat it from teh same can!
Warning:May contain traces of horsemeat/pee.

Buy one entree, Get one free! Of significantly lesser value when you order three addtional meals, combos, party platters or catering service for 24 at regular price.
Hurligan's! The mid-priced restaurant chain outside an office building where really low-income families come to celebrate a birthday! Also 2 summer favourites are given below which are available for just $12.99 each for a limited time only!
1. Combo Feast Platter
a) Refried Burrito Toast
b) Six Microwave Popcorn Shrimp
c) Three Pluck & Chew Chicken Guts
d) 800 ml of the batter dipped in by someone else's steak!
e) Plus All You Can Eat From Our Bottomless Squid Cooker!

2. Platter Feast Combo
a) Steak and Cheese Fried In Broccoli Sauce
b) Chicken-Fried Potato
c) Four Pry & Yank Digested Crab Legs
d) Four Sauteed Chicken Bladders
e) All this and unlimited visits to the pudding vat!
PS:Present coupon to serve with secret handshake. Offer not valid on weekends or holidays, during breakfast, lunch or dinner.